There’s no question but what we develop our identity based partially on our self-perception. But can we really trust our own self-perception? Do we accurately know what we did and said? I love telling stories to my grandkids about our family. More than often than not, at least one of my daughters will very quickly say, “that’s not how it happened. I was there.”
That brings a lot of laughter, especially from me. My general attitude to my kids is that if they’re not intelligent enough to poke fun at me, they’re not my kids. But it’s still a very important question. Do we really know what we said and did in a past experience. The police say never to trust an observer’s narrative. There are a number of reasons for that. We usually see what we want to see, we look but often don’t see, we wear rose-colored glasses, or sometimes we connect dots that really don’t connect.
One study goes for the jugular on this question: do people know how they behave?