In an enlightening conversation with a 25 year-old finance worker this weekend, a number of reasons why it's so difficult to get useful--read, developmental--feedback were surfaced. Millennials, perhaps more than any generation have brought the need for feedback to the fore. Yet, again and again in various professional settings, I meet employees of all generations who are asking for more feedback from their managers, but not getting it.
Feedback is terrifically important. There are plenty of studies showing that it''s nearly impossible to learn and grow without constructive feedback.
Reflecting on that issue, I was reminded of an article by Jim Heskett of Harvard Business School on what to me is a related subject: 'Why don't managers think deeply?'
Before I surface what my Millennial friend revealed, I'd like to summarize Heskett's researched conclusions. One of the reasons execs don't think deeply is because they are effective at deploying other people's ideas. But some suggest also that managers are not trained to think deeply. Or, they've been rewarded for their previous success and that success serves as a roadblock to thinking and change. The most frequently stated reason for lack of deep thinking is lack of time.
Now notice the parallels with what my young friend suggests. He started out with the notion that in his experience, a lot of managers don't know how to give constructive feedback. They do not observe and analyze behavior. (I'd add that many managers haven't been taught to observe and analyze behavior. I'm quite willing to protect them, on that issue.) As a consequence, when a person asks for feedback, the typical response is the generic stroke. "You did a good job." Useless for development or even skill confirmation. My friend also suggested that he happened to know that some managers had had bad experiences with feedback, and didn't want to deal with the possible blowups. In addition, he reminded me that first impressions are lasting, and that many managers may not look for progress. In short, you're not liable to get developmental feedback because of your manager's failings.
Notice that all of the causes for poor feedback, like that of poor thinking, were laid at the manager's feet. One of the most useful insights I've gained over the past century is that really constructive feedback comes best when an employee is thoughtful, concrete, focused, and specific in asking for feedback. (I'd also suggest that some of the best managerial thinking comes when an employee takes a real problem, details it significantly, hands it to his/her manager, explaining why he can't resolve it, why it's a high priority, and sells it--but I'm not going there now.) In other words, getting effective developmental feedback is a two way responsibility--not merely your manager's problem. And it's going to take time to learn how to get it.
What my reasoning argues for is that getting really constructive feedback is just as much an employee's issue as a manager's. In effect, what I've found is that feedback is a two-way street--a responsibility belonging both to the asker and the giver.
So what keeps you from guiding the feedback input? Some of the same issues your manager faces. No training in asking for feedback, little successful past experience, not thinking deeply about how to ask for it, not understanding the content you need, and lack of analytical skills.
Surprise! Surprise! I believe that the most effective process for getting truly constructive/developmental feedback is to coach it out of your manager. Furthermore, given the history of managerial failure at feedback, I think that's reality. If you're going to be successful, the shoe is really on your foot more than your manager's. That's also the new employee contract. It has crossed my mind more than once that the expecting managerial feedback is part of the old/traditional employee/employer contract.
"OK, Erwin," you're thinking. "You've inveighed against advice giving without protocols and scripts in a previous post--but that's all this post has been--just advice. What are you going to do about it?" In the near future, I'm posting a new---free--white paper, well researched and redacted by clients that will include protocols and scripts for for feedback. Watch for it!I'
I'd really appreciate your comments on this post! It's a fundamental career development issue.
